happy birthday to me and may all my wishes come true

Turning 26 today.

Yoohoo.

Getting closer to 30, feeling like a teenager and acting like a child. Its great.

Growing up makes me feel more and more immature every time.

There was a time I felt too mature for my age, when I was 16 and I was going to the theatre and reading philosophy and had serious conversations with old people.

Now its the complete opposite. It feels like I should "be" a bit more than what I am now, at the age of 25 (oops, 26, better get used to that). It seems like I should be acting differently. Have different goals. Look in other directions.

But no,

I still love Erasmus parties.

I still wanna travel and see the world.

I still want to study something completely random.

Im still not ready for commitment, whether thats a serious relationship or a steady job.

And most of all..

I still dont know what I want to be when I grow up.

Problem. Im already a grown up. I already have a job, I live by myself, I own a car, I live independently. I got the whole "adult" package. In fact, I couldnt be anymore adult. Or perhaps I should get a bank loan and spend the next 20 years repaying it, maybe that will make me feel more like a grown up.

Im turning 26 today. And Im still figuring out how to live.

Hopefully by the time I turn 27, I ll have it all figured out.